positivepatton:

Reminder

No matter how much your abuser does for you

No matter how expensive the things they buy for you are

No matter how nice they act when they’re not being abusive

No matter how much they seem like a good parent/friend/relative/partner/etc. and no matter how many people say that they are

They still are (or were) abusing you.

You don’t have to forgive them or be comfortable around them no matter what they do for you.

It doesn’t take back what they did or make them any less abusive.

This same logic applies to bullies or manipulative people or anyone else who wrongs you. Doing good things doesn’t undo the bad or take away your trauma.